Grudge Match
by JayDeeDubya
Summary: What happens when you put a single Klondike bar between a certain red-capped plumber looking for a midnight snack and a bored blue hedgehog? Read and find out! Oneshot, heavily Mario & Sonic-centric, rating is for mild language.


**Grudge Match**

Author's Notes: For convenience of comprehension, battle terrain is described from a third-person view, not unlike you would see from watching a normal Smash Bros fight, regarding the arena layout. This story contains violence, mild language and possible slight out-of-character writing for Mario and Sonic (I think, anyway, Mario's a little difficult to pin in that respect), so read (or don't) accordingly. Written mostly to tune up my writing skills, but also because I'm bored waiting for Brawl. And come on, who _doesn't_ want to see these two fight? Also, "_italics"_quotes are for thoughts, if that doesn't go without saying.

Disclaimer: I don't own Mario, Sonic, Crazy Hand, Smash Bros, Klondike Bars, or anything else mentioned in this 'fic, they belong to their respective owners.

Minor Post-Upload Revision: Extended the Crazy Hand kitchen scene slightly.

* * *

The halls of the Smash Bros. Base were strangely quiet that night, a rather rare occurrence when factoring in that it was now residence to over thirty fighters, or "Smashers" as they were properly called. A certain red-capped, overall-clad plumber was thoroughly enjoying the current lack of, well, chaos, and had taken this opportunity for a late-night snack. He didn't outwardly express it, but Mario was glad that Fox McCloud and Samus Aran, two of the more tech-savvy Smashers, had finally managed to bring the battle arena teleport system back on-line on January 31 after a system crash the month before. Smashers brawling in the halls could easily wear on ones' nerves, after all. 

Mario casually strode down the hallway, passing the newly-dubbed "Brawl Room", which contained numerous "warp pads" that could transport one to just about any point in existence, where the Smashers would fight it out for glory, bragging rights, the last soda. If it was conceivable, chances are it was probably brawled over at some point in time.

The plumber's pace quickened slightly as he passed the Brawl Room, sounds of cheering, as well as that of fighting from the various monitors within, echoing throughout the hall from the slightly-ajar door. The mesh of voices was too thick to tell who was brawling and who was the audience. As he rounded the corner, heading towards the kitchen, said chaotic mesh faded into nothing at the distance. Much to Mario's delight, the kitchen was vacant. Well, except for Crazy Hand, but giant floating gloves don't really eat, so he promptly disregarded the threat to his midnight munchies.

"Oh, hey Crazy," greeted Mario.

"Am_ not!_" the fidgeting glove responded indignantly, glaring at Mario, only adding further confusion to the situation. Mario raised an eyebrow at this retort, but shrugged and made his way to the fridge. _"Typical Crazy Hand. Probably forgot his pills again. Wait, how does a giant, insane glove even take pills in the first place? Or glare, for that matter?"_ pondered the now-baffled plumber, failing to find any trace of edible substance. After jotting down "Groceries" on the fridge dry-erase board, he cracked open the freezer in a last-ditch effort to sate the desire for a snack. Looking within, it seemed practically empty, save for ice buildup and just about nothing else.

Far in the back corner of the freezer, though, something caught Mario's eye. Something presumably filling the quota of "snack". Something wrapped in shiny, silver paper. This something just happened to be the Smash Bros' last Klondike Bar.

Just as Mario reached for the delectable piece, the kitchen doorknob rattled slightly, as if being opened. Remembering that he'd specifically closed it after entering, Mario quickly slammed the freezer shut, hands fiddling behind his back and whistling nonchalantly afterwards. Carefully stepping away from the freezer, he went to check who was intruding on his precious Klondike-bar-eating time.

As if on cue, the door swung open, revealing one of the new Smashers: a bipedal spiny blue hedgehog wearing red-and-white striped sneakers. The newcomer's green eyes narrowed slightly on sight of Mario's red-and-overalls form.

"Sonic."

"Mario."

The stiff demeanor between the two Smashers was not necessarily out of dislike, rather from their long-standing "mascot rivalry" as some called it, which resulted in high anticipation of a brawl between them; some Smashers were already starting to make bets. "Hey there, Crazy," Sonic greeted the still fidgeting Crazy Hand after a seconds-long silence.

"_I_ might not be the crazy one! In fact, I may just be the only one who_ isn't_, oh yes!" ranted the deranged glove, causing Sonic to shoot a baffled glance at Mario, who shrugged.

"He's like that, you get used to it after awhile," was the plumber's answer.

"So, he on 'meds or something?" asked Sonic after another small lapse of silence.

"Those weren't M&Ms? You _lied_ to meeeeee!" Crazy Hand wailed out towards some unknown antagonist, causing Mario and Sonic to cringe in dread.

"Wait, so he's like this _on_ pills? Now I'm kinda scared of how nuts he is off th--" Mario clapped a gloved hand over the hedgehog's mouth, muffling his speech.

"Who said that!? I'll show him what-for!" A pissed-off Crazy Hand was _not _someone a person would want to hang around. In a rather entertaining twist of irony, his number-one pet peeve was being referred to as crazy, insane or any synonyms therein. Mario and Sonic glanced at each other, and then around, for some kind of scapegoat to divert the glove's delusional fury.

Mario was at a loss for any solutions that did not involve Crazy Hand mashing the newcomer into a fine paste, when Sonic chimed in, "Uhm... Kirby?" As fate would have it, said puffball was passing by the now-ajar kitchen door, who squeaked in horror and bolted as the enraged hand tore out of the kitchen after him, shouting various obscenities of which would remain without detail.

"So... What's up?" asked the blue newcomer, attempting to stir up some conversation.

"Obviously aside from the whole Crazy Hand thing, I was getting a snack," Mario responded.

"Hey now, that sounds good, what's in the fridge?" was Sonic's next question, followed immediately by bolting over and peering inside before getting an answer.

"Er, uh... nothing?" was Mario's answer, who was trying in vain to remain nonchalant. As Sonic attempted to open the freezer, Mario intervened, concerned for the fate of his delectable frozen treat. "There's nothing, really, I already checked."

"You sure? There might be some good stuff way in the back," Sonic queried, hastily opening the freezer and digging through its contents, which almost-exclusively consisted of old ice shavings. "Nothing, nothing, more nothing... Aha!" he exclaimed. Mario's face went pale with horror, as he saw his precious Klondike bar in his rival's gloved hand. "... Crap, just one."

"Hey, I was saving that!" snapped Mario, as the newcomer prepared to unwrap the snack.

Sonic paused for a moment. "Oh, really?" He placed the Klondike bar on the counter, still wrapped. "In that case, let's brawl for it!"

"You've got yourself a fight then!" was Mario's rebuttal. "Although, isn't the Brawl Room packed to max. capacity right now?"

Sonic shrugged. "It was, but it's probably calmed down after that brawl with the 'kings' was over. So let's go!" He answered, sprinting over to the Brawl Room.

* * *

All of the Smashers were present in the Brawl Room, eagerly anticipating this clash between Mario and Sonic, although Bowser, Ganondorf and DeDeDe were battered from their previous brawl, and Kirby, breathing heavily from fatigue, had apparently narrowly escaped Crazy Hand's previously-mentioned "what-for". "This brawl will be a three-stock fight, with all items active, on Battlefield," stated the Wire Frame operating the warp system control panel, "Smashers Mario and Sonic, step onto the warp pads". Before doing so, the two competitors shook hands in a sportsmanly fashion. 

"May the best Smasher win," said Mario.

"Yup, planning on it," was Sonic's response, causing his opponent to roll his eyes.

"We'll see about that," the plumber retorted. _"Arrogant little..."_

"Well, yeah." _"Uptight..."_

* * *

Before there was any more inner monologue had to not be exchanged, the two competitors were whisked off to the standard Battlefield arena in a flash of blinding light. During the seconds of the warp length, Sonic had developed a sensation in the pit of his stomach akin to free-falling, catching him by surprise and slightly unnerving him. The hedgehog was still rather inexperienced in brawling, due to the manager wanting to minimize Sonic's fights for publicity reasons. "_That manager guy could've practically been that nutso glove's brother or something. Master Something-or-other was his name, right?"_ he thought. Before Sonic could mentally compare the two, though, the warp sequence ended, and he was standing on the westernmost of Battlefield's platforms, his overall-clad opponent staring him down from the opposite eastern one. The aptly-named Battlefield was a simple arena, composed of a medium-sized flat main stage, which had three floating platforms just above it, the center slightly higher than the rest. 

"Three!" boomed a voice out of nowhere, presumably the Wire Frame operating the Brawl Room control panel. The newcomer nodded at his veteran opponent, who returned the gesture in kind. Such was usually an unspoken way of saying "good luck" in the Smash Bros. Base.

"Two!" Sonic exhaled, then took a deep breath in preparation for this fight.

"One!" Both Smashers took on fighting stances.

"GO!"

Right as the start of the brawl was declared, Mario immediately opened the match with a powerful burst of water from his F.L.U.U.D backpack. Still getting his bearings, Sonic ducked under the west platform, narrowly avoiding the water jet, and popping up to the east platform with a swift Spin Dash. Leaping upwards gracefully, Mario avoided the charge, and landed on the center platform.

_ "Not gonna be that easy, pal!" _Sonic quickly changed his direction in midair, slamming Mario with a second Spin Dash, the resultant impact sending the plumber skidding and tumbling onto the west platform. On a roll, the newcomer proceeded to follow up with his Homing Attack. He jumped, then crashed down, spinning in an erratic blue blur, only to be met with an uppercut from his red-capped foe , which sent him sprawling on the center platform.

Mario seized this opportunity, jumping over to the center platform, and scorching Sonic with a burst of fire generated from his palm, who fell to the main floor directly below. Sonic, meanwhile, got to his feet shortly after impact. The hedgehog quickly dropped a spring, and used it to shoot back up to the center platform, hitting Mario with an upward spinning kick on the way up, and another powerful, albeit not-spinning downward kick on his descent, at which point Mario was momentarily stunned upon the east platform.

The impact of this second kick sent Mario flying over the side of the arena, dangerously close to a KO. As Sonic took a moment to catch his breath, he noticed a circular rainbow emblem with the traditional Smash crest, an off-center black cross, in the center. _"Oh, sweet!"_

Mario narrowly managed to get back onto the platform safely with the use of his Super Jump Punch technique, just in time to see his spiny blue opponent spring up towards the newly-materialized Smash Ball. "Not on my watch!" he growled, sprinting to the Smash Ball's now-west-platform destination. As Sonic was about to unleash one last Homing Attack on the Smash Ball, Mario delivered a powerful punch to the back of his rival's head, sending him skidding and dazed. Without a moment's delay, Mario cracked open the coveted item with a Fireball, causing the red-capped plumber to glow with a prismatic aura.

"Why, you..." Sonic grumbled, wincing at the sharp pain now in the back of his skull as he got back onto his feet. The newcomer visibly flinched as he saw the rainbow glow of his opponent, knowing that he was about to be on the receiving end of a Final Smash. No sooner than that, did Mario brace himself and unleash his Final Smash, Mario Finale, sending a volley of gigantic fireballs across the Battlefield towards the hapless hedgehog. _"Aah, crap,"_ was his last thought before the lethal volley tore across the Battlefield, obliterating Sonic's first stock, and causing him to momentarily black out.

Seconds later, Sonic regained his senses, and was now back on the west platform where he first started, slightly dazed, but in good fighting shape. No later than when he was aware of his surroundings again, Sonic immediately dropped down to floor level, and Spin Dashed towards his foe, bringing the fray to him.

"Again? Too predictable," scoffed Mario, jumping onto the east platform to avoid the assault.

"Time to get serious!" Sonic snapped, stopping his Spin Dash, and crashing to the platform above, along with Mario, with his Homing Attack. As if on cue with the improvisation, Sonic snatched up a Smart Bomb that had appeared mere seconds earlier, swiftly hurling it at Mario, who had been knocked over to the center platform from the previous attack. Attempting to avoid the vast incendiary blast, Sonic quickly ducked under the east platform, only narrowly doing so in time. Just as the Smart Bomb blast faded into nothing, the newcomer continued his relentless assault, springing up into a powerful uppercut, sending his mustached foe tumbling off into the distance, costing Mario his first stock for the brawl.

Once Mario safely reappeared on the Battlefield, he dropped down, and into a showdown, where the two stared one another down for several seconds. Or, catching their breath or something. After about five seconds, a Poke Ball materialized between the two Smashers, lightly thudding as it hit the stone tile. Daytime faded into evening's orange light as the Smashers swiftly dove for the red-and-white banded sphere. The plumber and hedgehog slid and crashed into each other, fumbling the prized Poke Ball, which bounced onto the center platform from the fighters' impact.

Reacting quickly, Sonic sprung up to the center platform, nabbing the ball just as Mario made his way to the same place. Expecting to barely get the prize, Mario's expectations were shattered as he was _just _quick enough to get the sphere bashed into his face, causing him to flinch momentarily. Sonic smirked as white light flooded from the ball. He smirked, _"Look at that, it's gotta be something big!"_

As the light faded, Sonic's jaw dropped as he beheld what the ball had released. Where he'd hoped for something big that'd kick Mario's ass, flopped a Goldeen, an orange-and-white goldfish-looking creature with a horn. Sonic smacked his palm to his face, slowly dragging it down. "If that isn't bad luck..." muttered the hedgehog. Down from the western platform, Mario snickered at his foe's predicament. Jumping over, he quickly grabbed Sonic and threw him hard downwards to the Battlefield's floor. Before his blue-spined foe could retaliate, he used the same fire-palm attack as earlier, sending Sonic skidding over the eastern ledge. Sonic attempted to spring back up, only to be met by a powerful stomp to the head that sent the newcomer soaring downward with alarming momentum, and leaving him on his last stock.

Flustered, Sonic aggressively rushed at his red-capped foe, hurling him to the ground before he could react, and unleashing a Spin Charge on top of him. Rolling backwards slightly and getting up, the two Smashers then unleashed a flurry of punches, kicks, and whatever else could be considered close-range combat at each other. Mario chuckled, _"Seems like blue boy's losing his cool."_

Dodging a sweeping kick from Mario, Sonic barreled past him, a familiar multicolor glint having caught the hedgehog's eye. The moment this second Smash Ball was no longer hanging over open air, Sonic leaped up and exerted his frustration on it in the blink of an eye. The plumber paled slightly as he turned around to face his opponent, seeing that Sonic had very swiftly busted the second Smash Ball. At that very moment, Sonic unleashed the power of the Smash Ball, engulfing himself in blinding white-gold light as seven differently-colored gemstones, or Chaos Emeralds as they were called, briefly cycled around him, transforming him into Super Sonic, the end result of his Final Smash.

The now-glowing-white-gold hedgehog smirked, levitating slightly. Before Mario could do much anything to dodge, Super Sonic charged forward, slamming into him with extreme force and catapulting him across the stage. "This isn't nearly over!" Sonic practically shouted, looping around behind the still-airborne Mario and slamming him with a second crushing impact, this one sending him skidding across the Battlefield floor. And then came a third devastating slam just as Mario reached the edge, sending him flying straight upwards. After a few seconds, his vision straightened out, his daze fading. The veteran was now free-falling high above the Battlefield, already seeing Super Sonic homing in on him.

_ "If I don't take another hit, I can likely recover."_ Not able to do much else, Mario attempted to line himself up to use his Super Jump Punch on Super Sonic. As the blazing gold blur got close, he unleashed his powerful aerial uppercut, hoping it would knock the offender away from him. Much to Mario's dismay, Super Sonic's charge negated the impact of his Super Jump Punch, sending the veteran spiraling to oblivion. That, or just his last stock, depending on the perspective.

Smirking once again in satisfaction at the KO, Super Sonic used the last precious few seconds of his Final Smash transformation to get back to the Battlefield's solid ground, at which time it expired, and he reverted to regular Sonic. As Mario reappeared on the east platform, the two once again stared one another down. "Give up yet?" jeered Sonic.

"It's not over 'till it's over. And unless I'm wrong, we're both on our last stock."

Sonic chuckled lightly, "I've gotta hand it to ya, you're tougher than you look."

Acknowledging the compliment, Mario nodded, "Likewise. Let's finish this, that Klondike's _mine!_"

"Not on your life. Here I go!" added Sonic, grinning, and immediately after, launching at Mario in the form of his Homing Attack. Like before, Mario attempted to retaliate with an uppercut, although it was slightly off-center this time, causing them both to be slammed hard by each others' attacks. Mario quickly got to his feet, grabbing, spinning and throwing Sonic towards the west platform. With instant response, Sonic swiftly rebounded and rammed into his foe with a Spin Dash, following up by Dashing again and popping back to the west platform, Mario landing on his back on the east platform.

Evening sun faded to night's softly-moonlit darkness as the brawl between Mario and Sonic entered its home stretch. The two Smashers relocated to the center platform, the continuing close-combat flurry still unrelenting. At that moment, a distinct _clank _noise caught the attention of the fighters, something had appeared on the floor level of the Battlefield. Mario ducked down to grab whatever it was, Sonic following suit without missing a beat.

The Smashers stood on the ground floor, an Assist Trophy now between them. As with the Poke Ball before, both fighters lunged for it. The difference with the Assist Trophy being, instead of bouncing like the Poke Ball did, the trophy's case shattered. Looking around, the two attempted to locate the unleashed Assist Trophy, and more importantly, wondering _who _had actually broken the casing. As the fighters frantically scanned the Battlefield, little did they think to look out behind it. And as a result, the large, polygonal face in the background went unnoticed, and proceeded to bombard our clueless Smashers with, well, giant rectangles, causing them both to quickly be catapulted off-stage and lose their last stock to the polygonal ambush. As the match was over, Mario and Sonic were then automatically warped back to the Smash Bros. Base...

* * *

"GAME SET!" announced the Wire Frame Operator Guy, warping an utterly baffled and slightly disturbed duo of Mario and Sonic. "This game's winner is... ANDROSS!" boomed Wire Frame Guy. 

"Oh, shut up," Mario and Sonic groaned in unison, departing for the kitchen.

"Mario, do ya have _any _idea what the hell just happened?" asked the still-baffled Sonic, only warranting a confused shrug from the inquired. "So the deal is, it was technically a draw, so we split the Klondike, right?" he queried hopefully, after a few moments' silence.

"How do you even split a Klondike bar anyway? It's only ice-cream encased in thin choco--" As they opened the kitchen door and entered, Mario's gaze scanned the counter, his jaw dropping in horror.

"Hey, what's up-- oh...

On the counter lay the last Klondike bar, melted chocolate and vanilla ice-cream oozing through the now-soggy wrapper.

"Damn it, I _knew_ there was something I forgot to do!" wailed Mario.

* * *

**To clear up a couple things that you may have somehow not caught**: 

-Both Mario and Sonic "threw" (Or more accurately, broke) the Andross assist trophy at the same time, thus canceling out the owner immunity effect and causing them both to get pummeled by him as a result. This is _not _an actual Brawl gameplay element, I made that little bit up for artistic convenience.

-Mario forgot to put the Klondike bar back into the freezer before the fight. And you know what happens to ice-cream when you leave it out.

Well, this is my first fanfic in quite awhile (To the sense of several years), so con-crit appreciated and such, I hope it wasn't _too_ painful to read.


End file.
